I’m having one of those days. A ‘meh’ moment in time. And I’m asking myself, ‘Why meh?’, just before I get my arse off my chair and do some jumping jacks as surely that will help me move the stagnant energy I’m wallowing in.
Is it the grey sky?
It has been pretty unrelenting, I’m sure there’s sunshine behind there somewhere. I’d even embrace the cold that curls around my fingers like icy gloves and the nippy wind that coaxes tears to my eyes effortlessly if the sun was shining and the sky blue.
Maybe my lesson is to embrace the grey. Generate the feeling of a brisk crisp smiling walk inside of me instead and get my arse outside and it will be so.
Is it the lack of shite I’m eating?
I’m on day two of a smoothie cleanse. It’s not harsh, it has fruit in it and nut butters as well as vegetables – it’s very tasty and even better, I don’t have to think about it as I have an app that tells me what to buy and what to bung in my blender.
But already, it is revealing to me how I use food. How I use it for love.
Sugar is my thing, it always has been and it’s fair to say I’ve indulged in more than my fair share of mince pies over the past few weeks. But I’ve just realised that I look to food as a way of giving myself a hug.
So now I need to find other, healthier ways to do this.
Maybe writing is one way
Because I’m sat here emptying my head again, not knowing if I’ll hit publish and already I feel better. Maybe expressing myself is a way of hugging myself. Loving myself.
That and a cup of ginger tea…
Photo by Carli Jeen