Grumpiness Does Not Become Me

It’s the third day since I faced fat and the eve before I start the Jason Vale Juicemaster – 7lbs in 7 Days detox and I’m feeling really grumpy.

I’m feeling pre-menstrual but that’s not due til around the 14th January so that’s impossible… So WHY am I feeling so foul?

*picks at fingernails and ponders the question for a few moments*

I think it’s a mix of things.

Since I faced up to things on the 1st of January, I’ve felt very ashamed of myself and of my body.

Sexy? What the fuck is that?!

My mojo has suddenly disappeared and I’m battling with good old Little Voice in my head.

Well I’ve silenced her for now and am just saying to the ‘mini me’ in my mind – I’m not arguing, you will see.

For I’m done with talk, there has to be action.  With action there will be reactions – good or bad – whatever the outcome SOMETHING WILL HAVE CHANGED.

And that is the thought that scares and excites me at the same time.

You may have been with me for some time, reading what I share with you and thinking “Oh here she goes again.”  If you have been, thank you.  Thank you for sharing this with me and even though I may exasperate you with my stop start stop start.. stop … start… approach I know you want me to achieve this as much as I do.

So here I am, feeling fat, frumpy, ugly and downright grumpy. Hating that my laptop is perched on my tummy – no cushion needed  and thinking about what I’m embarking on tomorrow.

7lbs in 7 Days

I’ve done it before, started a few times and only once followed it all the way through, so I know I CAN do it.  Why am I feeling scared?

It is a challenge but more than changing my food to just juices for 7 days, I realise I’ve got this little voice inside me saying, “Remember, you have to EXERCISE on this challenge and when did YOU last do that?” *cue manic laughter*

So I say to Little Voice – I hear ya bitch! but even if I only move my lardy self by walking for the required time when I’m supposed to, I’m going to do it.  And then, if I feel like upping the pace a little, then I will do it.  And if I feel like finally taking the wrappers off of some of the multiple exercise dvd’s I have stored away then I will do it.  But NOT doing anything will NOT happen (my sex life depends on it).

Ok… off to pour the last of the vodka down the sink and cover the chocolate biscuits in ketchup so I’m not tempted to retrieve them from the bin.  Ta rah!

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