Bleedin’ Hell

The title of this post, bleedin’ hell, came to me whilst in the shower this morning and I was surprised at the unexpected urge I had to put wodgie fingers to keyboard about this, possibly pivotal moment in my life.

Of course, shite Greek internet and endless distractions then ensued until I finally remembered why I’d logged into the back end of my website.

It hadn’t been to tell my hosting company exactly what I thought of their feeble response to my latest query. Nor was it to experiment with installing a CDN and minify plugin. Are your eyes glazing over yet? I’d like to say mine are so we can feel some affinity but I’d be lying – I LOVED that my Pingdom score became an A!

Anyway, the reason why I ventured onto my blog is to discuss my period, moon time, menstruation, being on the blob, whatever pet name you have for it.

Normally mine, thankfully, doesn’t have much effect on my life but this one has me feeling like I’m a blood fountain. Combined with the unexpected *ahem* bleary-eyed
result of too much wine and impulsive Kate Bush interpretive dancing/singing the night before (don’t ask), I had the perfect excuse to lie in bed for a whole day yesterday to feel sorry for myself and try to not leak artistic crimson trails everywhere.

Why am I talking about gushing blood

Ok maybe I’m not gushing but I am releasing a hell of a lot more than normal and I know this because I use a MoonCup as I can’t bear the thought of sanitary products in landfill or oceans. So I get to SEE exactly how much of the old ruby is escaping me.

The thought of using one makes my daughter wrinkle her nose and she has one friend who literally retches at the mere mention of this type of sanitary solution. Which makes me laugh quite wickedly. There are loads of different companies selling them online, so if you’d like to be enlightened, just Google menstrual cup.

Oh and also check out Thinx undies. I’m still not sure about those myself but after the experience I’ve just had, I reckon a little eco-friendly back up would probably be wise.

Back to my story…

I was talking to my sister about it all this morning, wondering aloud as to why this blood bath was happening and she shared – with some glee I may add – that I’m probably peri-menopausal. She then counted on her fingers to figure out when that started for her which was at 48 and I’m reaching that ripeness in August, so yeah, maybe I am.

Peri-menopause. Huh?

You may well be asking that as it appears not many women seem to talk about it. I, however, had the good fortune to do some work for a lovely lady called Deborah Crowe who wrote a book about her adventures on sorting out the nightmare of her peri-menopause symptoms. Check out her website or Facebook page, she’s funny!

Thankfully I’m not yet experiencing teeth gnashing rage at the drop of a hat – if I were I’d definitely imbibe medicinal mushrooms for that. My friend Gaile wrote a great post about her experience. And no, she wasn’t off her tits in a field somewhere, it was MUCH better, she found a magic hot chocolate solution with no psychedelic side effects.

Are you suffering symptoms?

Unfortunately, symptoms seem to be things that could be attributed to any number of ailments. Maybe ask yourself if you’ve been moaning about something more often than not as that could well be an indicator your hormones are off whack. Or if you “Simply can’t think of a thing darling!” I’m sure someone close to you will be able to tell you what your top (undoubtedly annoying) whinge is.

There’s an article on that looks like a good read with a way too long symptomatic list to check yourself against, if you’ve secretly been thinking you’re going a little crazy and don’t understand why.

What am I going to do now?

Well, as you may have guessed, I have zero intention of swallowing pills but it is the poke in the bum I need to take my health more seriously again and try some new self-experiments.

Actually, I’ve been tinkering with different types of fasting for some time now and am upping the stakes on that – I don’t want other peoples opinions on it just yet though, so will write something horribly personal about it all, that probably involves my bowel movements, if it works for me. Or even if it doesn’t, I’ll overshare anyway.

I bet you can’t wait!

In the meantime, feel free to share whatever you’ve found useful for you but don’t expect me to try it out, you crazy bitch xx

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2 thoughts on “Bleedin’ Hell”

  1. Bloody Hell :P

    Peri Menause! Thanks for sharing Bishkins, always a fun read and the legs look * Rawr*


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